The phrase “Diversity is being invited to the party; Inclusion is being asked to dance” has gained traction in discussions around diversity and inclusion. It’s easy to see why – it succinctly captures the difference between representation and genuine involvement. Diversity, in this context, is about who’s at the party, while inclusion is about whether they’re participating in the “Party Dance.”
This analogy helpfully distinguishes between simply having a diverse group present and actually ensuring everyone feels welcomed and engaged. It suggests that inclusion goes beyond just inviting people to the event; it’s about extending an invitation to participate, to join in the “party dance.”
However, while the phrase is useful as a starting point, it risks oversimplifying the complexities of true inclusion, especially when we consider the dynamic of a “party dance.” Focusing solely on “being asked to dance” as the pinnacle of inclusion can be misleading and even limiting in its scope.
The problem lies in the inherent passivity of “being asked.” In the context of a “party dance,” being asked to dance often implies a power dynamic. Someone is doing the asking, and someone is being asked. This dynamic can mirror real-world scenarios where inclusion efforts are driven from a position of power, with those in leadership roles deciding who gets to participate and on what terms in the “party dance” of an organization or social group.
Think about it in a corporate setting. If “inclusion” is merely “being asked to party dance,” then it suggests that those in positions of influence are the ones extending invitations to participate in celebratory or visible activities, rather than embedding inclusion into the strategic core of the organization. The invitation to “party dance” might be well-intentioned, but it can still leave the person being asked in a reactive position, responding to an invitation rather than actively shaping the dance floor.
Furthermore, the “asked to dance” scenario often positions the asker as the leader. In a traditional dance, the one who asks often leads, setting the pace and direction. If inclusion is only about being asked to dance, are we implying that some groups will always be in the position of leading the “party dance,” while others merely follow?
A more empowering vision of inclusion, particularly in the context of “party dance,” would be one where everyone feels equally empowered to initiate the dance. It’s not just about waiting to be asked to participate in the “party dance”; it’s about creating an environment where everyone feels they can ask others to dance, suggest new dance moves, or even help choose the music for the “party dance.”
Perhaps a better way to think about inclusion in relation to “party dance” is to move beyond just “being asked.” Consider these alternative perspectives:
- Inclusion is dancing: This shifts the focus from waiting for an invitation to actively participating in the “party dance.” It suggests a more proactive role in engaging and contributing.
- Inclusion is choosing the music for the party dance: This elevates involvement to a level of influence and agency. It’s not just about dancing; it’s about having a say in the direction and atmosphere of the “party dance.”
- Inclusion is being part of the party dance planning committee: This represents the highest level of inclusive participation. It’s about being involved in the foundational decisions that shape the entire “party dance” experience, from its conception to its execution.
Ultimately, striving for true inclusion means moving beyond the idea of simply “being asked to party dance.” It’s about creating a space where everyone feels empowered to be a dancer, a choreographer, and even a DJ in the “party dance” of our communities and organizations. It’s about fostering an environment where everyone can contribute their unique rhythms and styles to the dance floor, creating a truly vibrant and inclusive “party dance” for all.
