Have you ever dreamt of captivating your partner with a sensual striptease leading into an unforgettable intimate moment? If so, you’re tapping into a desire that’s both natural and incredibly exciting. Learning How To Lap Dance isn’t just about foreplay; it’s about forging a deeper connection with your partner, igniting passion, and confidently embracing your sensuality through seductive movements.
Men are undeniably drawn to lap dances, and it’s more than just the visual stimulation of gyrating and suggestive movement. It’s an experience that can be incredibly liberating for you too. The act of seduction, of confidently owning your body and movements, can make you feel powerfully sexy and self-assured even before physical intimacy begins.
However, the idea of giving a lap dance can feel daunting, especially if you’re not a seasoned dancer or have never tried it before. But fear not! With the right guidance and a little practice, you can master the art of the lap dance and unlock a new level of erotic confidence and intimate connection. This guide will provide you with the essential steps to give a lap dance that will not only thrill your partner but also empower you.
Giving a lap dance is a unique and intensely fun way to initiate intimacy, whether for a special occasion or as a thrilling addition to your regular foreplay routine. Sharing this kind of passionate expression can inject excitement and novelty into your relationship. The duration of your lap dance is entirely up to you, depending on your comfort level, music selection, and the overall mood you wish to create.
One of the most common questions when considering a lap dance is: “How do I give an amazing lap dance without feeling awkward or amateur?” If you’re eager to discover the secrets to giving a lap dance that will leave your partner breathless, keep reading.
1. Treat it Like a Sexy Special Occasion
Lap dancing should be viewed as a special, seductive gift you offer your partner, not an everyday routine. In our culture, erotic dance is often narrowly associated with strip clubs and music videos. However, its potential for intimacy and personal empowerment extends far beyond these contexts.
Imagine the captivating power you wield as your partner becomes utterly mesmerized by your every move, their desire escalating with each sway of your hips. Learning how to lap dance equips you with immense erotic power and a newfound confidence that permeates all aspects of your sensuality. It transforms an ordinary moment into an extraordinary experience of connection and desire.
2. Practice Your Lap Dance Moves
Long before you plan to give your partner a lap dance, dedicate time to dancing for your own enjoyment. Curate a playlist of songs that resonate with your sensuality and make you feel sexy and empowered. Practice dancing to these songs, focusing on the sensations within your body and how the movements feel.
Forget about the mirror and dismiss any self-consciousness about how you look. Shift your focus entirely to how the movements feel to you. One of the most effective pieces of advice is to “get out of your head and into your hips!” Often, women expend excessive energy worrying about their appearance, their partner’s thoughts, and whether they are performing “well” enough.
Redirect that energy inward and concentrate on your physical sensations. Bring your awareness down into your body, specifically to your hips, and notice the pleasurable sensations of movement. Begin by placing your hands on your hips and gently swaying them from side to side. Observe how your entire body naturally curves and responds. Then, try thrusting your hips forward and feel the arch in your spine. These natural bends and curves are inherently sexy and contribute to the allure of the dance.
Embrace your body’s natural shape and curves. If you feel you have extra flesh, learn to use it to your advantage. Accentuate your curves as you bend and sway to the rhythm of the music. Place your hands firmly on the arms of a chair to stabilize yourself and enhance the hip movements as you sway from side to side.
Next, select music that truly inspires you to move. You might choose an upbeat, high-energy song that ignites your inner fire and makes you feel bold and alive. Alternatively, you might prefer a more sensual, slow song that encourages graceful and intimate movements. Experiment with different tempos and genres to find what best unlocks your sensual expression.
Discover the songs that make you feel most vibrant, erotically charged, and ready to captivate your partner. Dance to these songs repeatedly until you feel completely at ease, your hips moving fluidly and instinctively with the rhythm. You don’t need to choreograph an elaborate routine. Instead, identify a few key moves that feel genuinely sexy and natural to you. The more confidence you exude in your movements, the more intense the desire you will cultivate in your audience of one.
3. Get Your Space Ready
When you’re ready to give your partner a lap dance, take a few moments to thoughtfully prepare the space. Creating the right ambiance is crucial for setting the mood and enhancing the experience.
Begin by clearing the area around your most comfortable chair. Visualize your partner seated there, their eyes fixed on you with admiration and desire. Ensure you have ample space to move freely around the chair, allowing you to dance a full 360-degree circle of seduction.
Dim the lights to create a more intimate and mysterious atmosphere. Soft lighting, candlelight, or even colored light bulbs can dramatically transform the room and heighten the sense of novelty and excitement. Consider using red or purple hues to enhance the sensual mood.
Curate a playlist of music that aligns with the mood you want to create. Whether it’s slow and sultry R&B, rhythmic Latin beats, or sensual electronic music, the right soundtrack will amplify the experience. Craft an atmosphere that makes you feel sexy, seductive, and inspired to dance. As you prepare the space, take deep, calming breaths to center yourself and get into the zone. This preparation is not just about the physical setting; it’s about mentally and emotionally preparing yourself to fully embody the role of seductress.
4. Make Sure Your Body and Mind Are in the Zone
What you choose to wear for your lap dance performance is entirely a matter of personal preference and the statement you want to make. The possibilities are vast and cater to every style and comfort level.
You could opt for a glamorous approach and dress in your most stunning dress and high heels. Imagine going out on a date and then surprising your partner with a lap dance as a sensual “dessert” when you return home. Alternatively, you might choose to wear alluring lingerie discreetly hidden beneath casual clothes, creating a tantalizing surprise on a relaxed Sunday morning.
The key is to make it uniquely yours. A lap dance is, at its core, an authentic expression of your sexuality. It’s about feeling comfortable and confident in your own skin.
Since you will be in close physical proximity to your partner, take the time to indulge in self-care before your performance. A long shower or bath can be incredibly grounding and relaxing. Anoint yourself with a fragrance you love – one that makes you feel sensual and alluring. These small acts of self-pampering will enhance your confidence and help you feel more poised and ready to connect intimately with your partner.
Mentally, it’s crucial to set aside the mundane worries of daily life. Temporarily put aside your to-do lists and responsibilities. Consciously step into the persona of a seductress. For this precious interlude, your sole focus is to inhabit your body fully, to feel so incredibly good that you cast a spell, drawing your partner into your realm of pleasure.
Remember, while you are giving a gift to your partner, you are simultaneously gifting yourself the time and space to feel undeniably sexy, vibrantly alive, and sensually awakened. This is an act of self-celebration as much as it is an act of seduction.
5. Build Up the Anticipation — It Will Drive Him Wild!
Don’t explicitly reveal your lap dance plan to your partner beforehand. Instead, create an air of mystery and anticipation by hinting that you have something special in store. Let their imagination run wild with possibilities, heightening their excitement and eagerness.
When you are ready to begin, start your lap dance in a style that feels authentic and comfortable to you. You could start by playing the music and confidently strutting into the room, your body language radiating sensuality. Alternatively, you might turn away initially, then slowly glance over your shoulder as the music begins, offering a playful wink before you start to move. Whatever your chosen approach, the crucial element is to commit fully to the performance.
Trust that your partner is not going to critically analyze your dance technique. They will be overwhelmingly thrilled by the opportunity to bask in your beauty and sensuality. They will be captivated by your confidence and the way you own your body. Dismiss any worries about executing every move perfectly and allow yourself to simply have fun with it. Your genuine pleasure and enjoyment are the secret ingredients that will make your lap dance unforgettable.
Embrace your power, move in a way that feels pleasurable to you, and know that you are giving your partner an extraordinary gift: the privilege of witnessing your gorgeous body in motion, celebrating its sensuality and strength.
6. Ladies, Strip Tease It Out
Initiate your lap dance from a distance, timing your approach with the rhythm and flow of the song. Aim to have your final, most intimate moves coincide with the song’s most climactic moments, bringing you right onto their lap at the perfect time.
As you gain confidence, consider creating a playlist designed for a multi-song seduction. Start with slower, more sensual tracks and gradually build up to songs with more intense rhythms that encourage grinding and close body contact. However, for your initial attempts, focusing on one sexy song is perfectly sufficient. Recognize that you have approximately three to five minutes to give it your all and make a lasting impression.
Begin your dance from afar, establishing eye contact with your partner. Slowly start moving into your dance, letting your body language tell a story of seduction. Incorporate elements of striptease by gradually removing one item of clothing at a time. Or, if you prefer, you can keep all your clothes on – the choice is entirely yours. You can even seamlessly blend striptease and lap dancing. Your partner will be enthralled regardless of any nervousness you might feel.
If undressing makes you feel more self-conscious initially, feel free to keep all your clothes on or strip down only to your lingerie. This is your expression of sensuality, so prioritize what makes you feel most empowered and comfortable.
As you move, gradually approach your partner and then gracefully retreat. Move around behind them, lightly stroking their hair and shoulders. Allow them to feel the soft graze of your breasts or hair against the nape of their neck.
Then, circle back around to face them. Your primary goal is to tease and tantalize, building their anticipation and making them ache for your touch. Create a delicious tension that intensifies their desire with every movement and gesture.
7. Keep It Simple
You don’t need elaborate or complicated choreography to give a captivating lap dance. In fact, simplicity can be incredibly effective.
Once you’ve built up anticipation with your movements and teasing, begin dancing closer to your partner. When you feel the timing is right and your confidence is peaking, initiate the climax of the lap dance – the actual lap contact.
Turn so you are facing away from your partner and slowly lower your hips, gradually sinking closer and closer to their lap. Whether they become fully erect or not, remember that an erection is not the sole indicator of their arousal or enjoyment. So, avoid focusing on or worrying about their physical response.
Here are four simple yet highly effective moves to incorporate once you are dancing in their lap:
1. Start by swaying your hips left and right. This seemingly simple move is surprisingly potent. Enhance it by adding a subtle dip, bending your knees slightly as you sway. This adds a dynamic and rhythmic element to the motion.
2. Lower your hips so they are just barely hovering above their lap and then move your body in smooth circles in time with the music. This circular motion creates delicious friction and intimacy without being overly aggressive.
3. Try a pelvic tilt by gently thrusting your hips forward and back. For an extra touch of playful sensuality, give your hips an extra push as you move back, encouraging your booty to bounce in a tantalizing way.
4. The fourth move you can try is a simple bounce squat. Position yourself squarely above their lap and then perform quick, controlled squats up and down, bouncing lightly on their lap without making full, heavy contact. This move is a fantastic tease and a major turn-on. Experiment with the speed – start with slow, deliberate squats and gradually increase the tempo until you are bouncing just above them, creating a playful, teasing energy.
Throughout these moves, remember to occasionally glance over your shoulder and make eye contact with your partner. They will be torn between wanting to gaze into your eyes and admire your beautiful body – this internal conflict itself is a delightful form of erotic tease.
8. Remember to Finish the Lap Dance Strong
As the song nears its end and you sense the climax of the lap dance approaching, transition to a powerful finishing position. Turn around so you are now facing your partner, straddling one or both of their legs. This shift in position offers a new level of intimacy and visual connection.
Once in this facing position, repeat the same four core moves: sway, thrust, circle, and bounce. Facing your partner means your breasts (whether clothed or not, they are still a focal point) will be closer to face level. Utilize this to your advantage. As you move your hips around their lap, be mindful of the myriad ways you can tease and tantalize them with your upper body as well.
When the song concludes, you have two equally compelling choices for how to end. You can choose to settle directly into their lap, letting the built-up energy naturally transition into kissing and further intimacy, allowing the passion to unfold organically. Alternatively, for a more dramatic and lingering effect, you can get up and confidently strut out of the room, leaving them breathless, spellbound, and yearning for more. Remember, you are in control of the narrative and the intensity of the moment.
9. Give Your Sexy Self a Pat on the Back
Choosing to give your partner a lap dance is a profoundly empowering step toward cultivating greater sexual confidence, both within and outside the bedroom. It’s an act of self-affirmation and a celebration of your sensuality.
When you can truly embrace the fact that you are gorgeous and worthy of your partner’s attention and desire, you begin to release self-consciousness about minor imperfections. Instead, you shift your focus to the incredible pleasure your body is capable of experiencing and giving.
Lap dancing is a gift that benefits both of you. Your partner receives the joy and arousal of watching you dance, and you receive the equally valuable pleasure of embodying a powerful seductress. It’s a reciprocal exchange of desire and admiration.
Remember to begin this journey by dedicating private time to dance and move to your favorite music. Bring your full awareness to the sensations within your body and recognize the immense pleasure you can derive simply from moving rhythmically.
Once you feel confident, sensual, and ready to seduce your partner with a lap dance, follow the steps outlined in this guide. You will create a potent pleasure spell that is guaranteed to transport both of you to a realm of heightened intimacy and unforgettable connection.
